Freewrite

I never really wanted a dog but me and this dog were super close and when we went to joplin i would play with her and walk her. JIms sister had anotherl chihuahua that they were going to mate jenny with but he got killed so jims mom said she wanted me to have the dog. when i came home one weekend there was a cage sitting in my room and there sat my new dog. she was so precious, she had big eyes and a fluffy tail. she was so small she couldnt barely jump on the couch. she had a favorite toy. it was this monkey that had a bell in it and she would cuddle with it and play with it everywhere. so to train her to jump on the couch wed take her monkey and put him on the couch and shed back up to the hallway and come running so fast so she could get enought momentum to jump on the couch. Pretty soon she became my everthing. she slept with me and i took her on walks around the neighborhood and car rides of course. Her and my cat were like best friends. they would chase eachother around and play. It was so cute. then the dark ages came. I decided jenny would be a good mom and my friend had a male long haired chihuahua so we decided to breed her. She had too many babies in her that she had internal bleeding  and the puppies started being born premature, soon after the 4 premature one, jenny died in my arms. Shes now buried in my backyard with a little headstone that says, “If love could have saved you, you would have lived forever.” I always go out and talk to her. After she died my cat was sad and hed wander around the house looking for her and meowing. Which made everything more sad.

Then the dark ages came.Jenny finally got pregnat  and we awere so ecxitedshe was so cute as a pregnant dogggy. she got so big and round. eventually though she got really really big, and we got worried. we took her to thte vet and they said she had 5 babies in her and they are only able to carry up to 4. and that the baies might be smashing her organs. but she was doing okayso we took her home and just watched out for her. then a baby came. it came out dead. a=but jenny still licked her baby and was there but she she turned around my mom had to take the baby and get rid of it because it wasnt alive and jenny eventually got really sad and would come take her pawa dna scratch at my mom then lead her back to the spot where she d=had hr babies and look at her like, “where are my babies” it was so heartbreaking. Jenny got worse as the days went on. She had a nother pup and he actually came ot alive , we name d him little lbit.  and she wouldlick him and watch him. She was a good mother, but little bit was too young that he could hopen his mouth to get the milk he needed to surivive. and 24 hours later, little bit was dead. my mom had stayed hom eall that time to watc jenny and i had been working so when i was finally off i stayed by her side while my  mom wnet to get groceries. the secon mom left jennys eyes started to fade away.. it was like i could see her spirit fading away. i started crying and holding her begging god to not take my dog away. i was nappoing my fingers in front of her to wake her up, w. My mom walked through the door and i said, “sometihings wrong.” jmy mom grabbed money to take her the vvetr but by the time we got to the garage door, jennys eyes hhad been abandoned by all sense of life. My mom croutched down h,lding her lifeless body tellin gher she was sorry and that she loved her, all i could do was sit on the couch. I was angry. I was mad at myseof. I blamed myself for her death. IT was up to me to decide if i wanted to breed her or not and breeding killed her. I couldnt talk
for months. I still avoid talking about her. She was my baby girl, i didnt want anyone to touch her stuff or move anything, i wanted everything left how it was when she was alive.